A horrible decision to make

[saggy]

Hi guys

If I didn't make it clear before, I really appreciated your support last time:


deguworld.proboards.com/thread/23583/degus-anaesthetic?page=1&scrollTo=213532


Little One was so good for so long after the previous plum sized tumour was removed even though she had lost a lot of blood before op and hadn't eaten properly for a while but back to being as fit as a fiddle like a 4 year old running all day even though she is now 8. Although I thought it was done with, her tumour came back after Christmas and it's inoperable because of the surface area it covers now as along the whole entire wound she previous had and has now expanded in all directions and out and although she's settled enough today with pain meds and eating, getting around, there's no point dragging it out any further and have to put her to sleep tomorrow morning. I wanted a little more time but they only had an early appointment. . It's so frustrating as she's really really fit and healthy apart from this blinking tumour which I will assume is benign and not spread even though it's so aggressive as she's had no other issues apart from the size of it and pain because of this. It has gown rediculously fast the past week - it's about the size of a tangerine now - perhaps a little bigger and she's can't even stand straight. I don't think I should add a photo as it's quite distressing.

I will have one left (Fatsy) who's fine but never had the best of health - was lazy although runs a little more these days but does have cataracts, can't see much at all and can't handle even a sniff of carbs or grain.

These two didn't like each other most their lives, it was other one called Tweeny who gelled the group together and it took some time for them to accept they only had each other when she died at the beginning of lockdown. 

The fact they never really liked each other but still cuddle and everything else means she does need company. But she's 8 and how much longer can she go on for? they both think of me as a degu (stack up on me and do as I order and they've both been cuddling up on me for hours tonight) so I know she'll get some confort from me but I'm at work all day, I can't climb in the cage and sleep with her and so on and I know she won't be happy. When I came back from work late yesterday to find Little One had deteriorated badly that day and wouldn't come out until I put her back on pain meds, Fatsy was clearly quite distressed too and was trying to be close to her even though Little One didn't really want her around so I know she's stressed a little already. She's keep trying to groom/investigate her tumour as well so she does care and will be affected by her leaving.

I have the option of putting her to sleep at the same time and I'm sooo sooo stuck on making a decision.

I really don't know what to do. My instinct/logic is to go through with it as no point living the last possible few months of her life miserable and alone. Emotionally I'm a wreck.

I don't know how to begin to make this decision.

I don't think she would last much longer as all the brothers and sisters she was born with that my Aunt had all died two to three years ago.

Many thanks for any advice, Sarah

PS, If I don't answer tonight it's because I've had to go to bed as exhausted and haven't slept properly for a couple of days.

[savvy]

OK, take a deep breath.

You are doing the right thing for Little One, there's no question of that.

Fatsy knows that Little One is ailing, so when you come back from the vets tomorrow with Little One, place her body in the cage so Fatsy can say goodbye. It will help with her grieving.

There are several things you can do for Fatsy. First of all, do you have a heatpad or a snugglesafe you can put in to give her a heat source? Also a pair of rolled up socks will give her something degu shaped to cuddle up against.

Other than that, give her time and lots of attention.

We've all been in your situation, and we are here for you.

Give yourself a hug and try to get some sleep.

[deguconvert]

Ditto, Savvy.

[moletteuk]

I don't know if I'm in time but since you are sure about Little One and definitely not sure about Fatsy, I think you should wait and see for Fatsy, they don't always react to being alone as you predict. I'm sorry about Little One.

[bouncy]

I agree it's time to let Little One go. If Fatsy has the chance to say goodbye, there's no reason why he shouldn't continue as he is. If you're reluctant to take on more goos, then a sock goo and cuddles, and see what happens.

Of one of my pairs, we were waiting for tumour-ridden Spidey to pass first. Instead, his brother Silly died suddenly. Grumpy and stubborn Spidey is still going, almost a year on!

[teemu]

I definitely agree with what others have said. It sounds like the right time for Little One, but degus can react to death in very distinct ways, so giving Fatsy a chance and seeing how things go is by no means a lost cause.

Try to stay strong, even though this is a horrible time. You're doing what's best, even if it is a really hard decision.